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Download free mp3 click here to play a part in ng's efforts to help the needy! HERE actually its not but just click pls. only takes a few seconds

Countdown to 2010 (GMT +8)

Monday, January 5, 2009






k have i posted this before...




















This program is freeware, you can copy it as much as you like.
If this program accidentaly screws up and destroys data on your PC, electrocutes you,makes your monitor explode in your face, set's your house on fire, kills you, causes everyone on the planet(and beyond) to try to kill you, hacks into a nearby nuclear misile and targets your house, changes your bank balance to $0, gets you banned from online games, adds your name to a hitman's list, sucks you into the computer and plays pong with you(with you as ball), causes secret agencies to come after you, makes you believe you got maggots crawling under your skin, turns your room into a gate to hell, becomes sentient and starts killing everyone on this planet, gets you sent to jail with a guy named big bubba or does anything else you don't want it to do, don't blame the author of this program!!

























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Having a Bad Day?
Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a burned out section of forest while assessing the damage done by a forest fire. The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit, complete with scuba tanks on his back, flippers, and face mask. A post-mortem revealed that the person died not from burns, but from massive internal injuries. Dental records provided a positive identification.

Investigators set about to determine how a fully clad diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire. It was revealed that on the day of the fire, the person went for a diving trip off the coast some 20 miles from the forest. The fire-fighters, seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible, called in a fleet of helicopters with very large dip buckets. Water was dipped from the ocean and then flown to the forest fire and emptied. You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like Flipper in the Pacific, the next he was doing the breast stroke in a fire dip bucket 300 feet in the air.

Apparently he extinguished exactly 5'10" of the fire. Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed - This article was taken from the California Examiner, March 20, 1998

STILL THINK YOU ARE HAVING A BAD DAY?

A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio and his wife was in the kitchen. The man was racing the engine on the motorcycle when it accidentally slipped into gear. The man, still holding onto the handle bars, was dragged through the glass patio doors and along with the motorcycle dumped onto the floor inside the house. The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room and found her husband lying on the floor, cut and bleeding, the motorcycle lying next to him, and the shattered patio door. The wife ran to the phone and summoned the ambulance. Because they lived on a fairly large hill, the wife went down the several flights of stairs to the street to escort the paramedics to her husband.

After the ambulance arrived and transported the man to the hospital, the wife righted the motorcycle and pushed it outside. Seeing that gas was spilled on the floor, the wife got some paper towels, blotted up the gasoline, and threw the towels in the toilet. The man was treated and released to come home. Upon arriving home, he looked at the shattered patio door and the damage done to his motorcycle.

He became despondent, went to the bathroom, sat down on the toilet and smoked a cigarette. After finishing the cigarette, he flipped it between his legs into the toilet bowl, while seated. The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard the loud explosion and her husband screaming.

She ran into the bathroom and found her husband lying on the floor. His trousers had been blown away and he was suffering burns on the buttocks, the back of his legs, and his groin. The wife again ran to the phone to call the ambulance. The very same paramedic crew was dispatched and the wife met them at the street. The paramedics loaded the husband on to the stretcher and began carrying him to the street. While they were going down the stairs to the street accompanied by the wife, one of the paramedics asked the wife how the husband had burned himself. She told them and the paramedics started laughing so hard, one of them slipped and tipped the stretcher, dumping the husband out. He fell down the remaining stairs and broke his arm - Taken from a Florida Newspaper.

STILL HAVING A BAD DAY?
Just remember, it could be worse.....

1. The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

2. A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current she whacked him with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking his arm in two places. Until that moment he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

3. Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn Germany. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the two hapless protesters to death.

And finally...

4. Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb he opened it and was blown to bits.





Spam some pictors heer..





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ahhhhhhhhhh help!!!!1111

photshop drawn

2B on sketchpad. FTW



dawg



haedshoot!!!!11


Sunday, December 7, 2008

A: i have boobs
A: huge boobs
B: I have a penis
B: huge penis
A: i have one of those to but two huge boobs
B: LOL
B: have you ever peed on your own boobs
A: Many a time
B: so divine

Originally Posted by xSaizenSunaiku
i get an erection everytime someone gets a warn in the burning zone for flaming or spamming, it excites me in a way no woman ever can.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Ooh a quiz XD

1. Write down anyone you know.
Er..yingchang
2. Your relationship with him/her?
fren
3. Give 5 of your impressions of them.
Them lol. Er...male, is taller than 1 cm, is taller than 2 cm, engrossed in learning French (lol), and.......um? 2 eyes.
4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you.
dunno
5. The most memorable thing he/she had said to you.
dunno too. Define "memorable"
6. If he/she becomes your lover, you will?
Nuke the whole country n kill myself
7. If he/she becomes your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be?
Dunno, im dead cos i killed myself
8. If they become your enemy, you will?
Bomb him
9. What it is you want to tell him/her now?
HI
10. Your overall impression of him/her is?
Er.......male? (i think so)
12. How do you think the people around you will feel around you?
I cant read minds
13. The characters you love of yourself are?
No idea
14. On the contrary, the characters you hate yourself are?
Also no idea
15. The most ideal person you want to be is?
erm..me?
16. For people that care and likes you, say something to them.
Hi
17. Write down any 10 names.
erm... lets see...
1) Yu Heng
2) Sudarno
3) Huang Guan
4) Stevani
5) Yuan Cheng
6) Your mom
7) Bing Hwang (did i spell wrong? o.-)
8) Guan Chao (t3h cl0wn)
9) Someone in Iraq
10) Modi (MODEHH)
names dam random sia lollollol
18. Who is no. 6 having relationship with?
Your father?...i think
19. Is no. 9 a male or female?
HE'S IN IRAQ HOW DO I KNOW!!?
20. If no. 7 and no. 10 are together, will it be a good thing?
LOL nice one. Tbh and Modi. One head not proportionate to body and the other...well undescribable
21. What is no. 2 studying about?
i dunno
22. What was the last time you had a chat with no. 3?
er....10/7/2008 8:24:38 AM...i think
23. Which band does no. 8 like?
Clown²
24. Does no. 1 has any siblings?
i dunno too
25. Will you woo no. 3?
OMG
26. How about 7?
OMG²
27. Is no. 4 single?
think so..but you never know eh?
28. What is the surname of no. 5?
Liau liau liau...
29. What is a hobby of no. 10?
Go geylang
30. Does no. 5 and 9 get along well?
Iraq? who'd go to iraq?
31. Where is no. 2 studying at?
erm...CCHMS
32. Talk about something for no. 1.
Hi
33. Have you tried developing feelings for no. 8?
A clown? OMG i'll nuke this country wif a bigass A-bomb and commit suicide.
34. Where does no. 9 live?
Iraq
35. What color does no. 4 like?
#AD234F (dun believe me)
36. Are no. 1 and no. 5 best friends?
dunno? classmates lar
37. Does no. 1 have any pets?
erm...do ants count?
38. Is no. 7 the sexiest person in the world?
OMG no waii
39. What is no. 10 doing now?
At geylang
Death By Scrabble or Tile M For Murder
______________________________

It's a hot day and I hate my wife.

We're playing Scrabble. That's how bad it is. I'm 42 years old, it's a blistering hot Sunday afternoon and all I can think of to do with my life is to play Scrabble.

I should be out, doing exercise, spending money, meeting people. I don't think I've spoken to anyone except my wife since Thursday morning. On Thursday morning I spoke to the milkman.

My letters are crap.

I play, appropriately, BEGIN. With the N on the little pink star. Twenty-two points.

I watch my wife's smug expression as she rearranges her letters. Clack, clack, clack. I hate her. If she wasn't around, I'd be doing something interesting right now. I'd be climbing Mount Kilimanjaro. I'd be starring in the latest Hollywood blockbuster. I'd be sailing the Vendee Globe on a 60-foot clipper called the New Horizons - I don't know, but I'd be doing something.

She plays JINXED, with the J on a double-letter score. 30 points. She's beating me already. Maybe I should kill her.

If only I had a D, then I could play MURDER. That would be a sign. That would be permission.

I start chewing on my U. It's a bad habit, I know. All the letters are frayed. I play WARMER for 22 points, mainly so I can keep chewing on my U.

As I'm picking new letters from the bag, I find myself thinking - the letters will tell me what to do. If they spell out KILL, or STAB, or her name, or anything, I'll do it right now. I'll finish her off.

My rack spells MIHZPA. Plus the U in my mouth. Damn.

The heat of the sun is pushing at me through the window. I can hear buzzing insects outside. I hope they're not bees. My cousin Harold swallowed a bee when he was nine, his throat swelled up and he died. I hope that if they are bees, they fly into my wife's throat.

She plays SWEATIER, using all her letters. 24 points plus a 50 point bonus. If it wasn't too hot to move I would strangle her right now.

I am getting sweatier. It needs to rain, to clear the air. As soon as that thought crosses my mind, I find a good word. HUMID on a double-word score, using the D of JINXED. The U makes a little splash of saliva when I put it down. Another 22 points. I hope she has lousy letters.

She tells me she has lousy letters. For some reason, I hate her more.

She plays FAN, with the F on a double-letter, and gets up to fill the kettle and turn on the air conditioning.

It's the hottest day for ten years and my wife is turning on the kettle. This is why I hate my wife. I play ZAPS, with the Z doubled, and she gets a static shock off the air conditioning unit. I find this remarkably satisfying.

She sits back down with a heavy sigh and starts fiddling with her letters again. Clack clack. Clack clack. I feel a terrible rage build up inside me. Some inner poison slowly spreading through my limbs, and when it gets to my fingertips I am going to jump out of my chair, spilling the Scrabble tiles over the floor, and I am going to start hitting her again and again and again.

The rage gets to my fingertips and passes. My heart is beating. I'm sweating. I think my face actually twitches. Then I sigh, deeply, and sit back into my chair. The kettle starts whistling. As the whistle builds it makes me feel hotter.

She plays READY on a double-word for 18 points, then goes to pour herself a cup of tea. No I do not want one.

I steal a blank tile from the letter bag when she's not looking, and throw back a V from my rack. She gives me a suspicious look. She sits back down with her cup of tea, making a cup-ring on the table, as I play an 8-letter word: CHEATING, using the A of READY. 64 points, including the 50-point bonus, which means I'm beating her now.

She asks me if I cheated.

I really, really hate her.

She plays IGNORE on the triple-word for 21 points. The score is 153 to her, 155 to me. The steam rising from her cup of tea makes me feel hotter. I try to make murderous words with the letters on my rack, but the best I can do is SLEEP.

My wife sleeps all the time. She slept through an argument our next-door neighbours had that resulted in a broken door, a smashed TV and a Teletubby Lala doll with all the stuffing coming out. And then she bitched at me for being moody the next day from lack of sleep.

If only there was some way for me to get rid of her.

I spot a chance to use all my letters. EXPLODES, using the X of JINXED. 72 points. That'll show her.

As I put the last letter down, there is a deafening bang and the air conditioning unit fails. My heart is racing, but not from the shock of the bang. I don't believe it - but it can't be a coincidence. The letters made it happen. I played the word EXPLODES, and it happened - the air conditioning unit exploded. And before, I played the word CHEATING when I cheated. And ZAP when my wife got the electric shock. The words are coming true. The letters are choosing their future. The whole game is - JINXED.

My wife plays SIGN, with the N on a triple-letter, for 10 points.

I have to test this.

I have to play something and see if it happens. Something unlikely, to prove that the letters are making it happen. My rack is ABQYFWE. That doesn't leave me with a lot of options. I start frantically chewing on the B.

I play FLY, using the L of EXPLODES. I sit back in my chair and close my eyes, waiting for the sensation of rising up from my chair. Waiting to fly.

Stupid. I open my eyes, and there's a fly. An insect, buzzing around above the Scrabble board, surfing the thermals from the tepid cup of tea. That proves nothing. The fly could have been there anyway.

I need to play something unambiguous. Something that cannot be misinterpreted. Something absolute and final. Something terminal. Something murderous.

My wife plays CAUTION, using a blank tile for the N. 18 points.

My rack is AQWEUK, plus the B in my mouth. I am awed by the power of the letters, and frustrated that I cannot wield it. Maybe I should cheat again, and pick out the letters I need to spell SLASH or SLAY.

Then it hits me. The perfect word. A powerful, dangerous, terrible word.

I play QUAKE for 19 points.

I wonder if the strength of the quake will be proportionate to how many points it scored. I can feel the trembling energy of potential in my veins. I am commanding fate. I am manipulating destiny.

My wife plays DEATH for 34 points, just as the room starts to shake.

I gasp with surprise and vindication - and the B that I was chewing on gets lodged in my throat. I try to cough. My face goes red, then blue. My throat swells. I draw blood clawing at my neck. The earthquake builds to a climax.

I fall to the floor. My wife just sits there, watching.

Friday, October 3, 2008

World Record #31415926535897932385

T3H MOST BIGASS CRAZY OMFGCOPTER HURRICANE EVER SPOTTED IN GUNBOUND



...And other stuff

Air raid by Boomer LOL (i noe its pixelated)

F7 button



Grub SS + Solar + Small pit

WTF bunge





Source of Pix: http://geloze.tripod.com/geloze/creedo.html

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Green
The bottle and the bomb

3 people were on a plane. One said to the pilot, "I have a glass bottle. What do I do with it?" The pilot told him to throw it out the window. The second one asked the same question and the pilot also told him to throw it out the window. The third one asked the pilot, "I have a bomb. What do I do with it?" The pilot told him to throw it out the window. When they landed they met a man crying. When asked why he was crying, he replied, "Because I got hit in the head with a glass bottle. They met a woman who was crying for the same reason. Then the met a man laughing. They asked him why he was laughing and he replied, "Because I walked by a building and farted. Then the building blew up.








RANDOM PICS lol

Crazy traffic light


Upside down?


Totally Random

SPAM o.O

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Rated Green

Stupid computer error messages

You know what ticks off Ben Ezzell? Bad error messages. Messages that "offer no intelligence, don't tell the user what's wrong [and] frustrate people," he says.

Ezzell is a veteran programmer and author (how many books has he written? "I think 23," he says with uncertainty) who lives in Guerneville, Calif. While researching his latest book, "Developing Windows Error Messages," Ezzell and publisher O'Reilly & Associates held a contest in which they asked people to send in their favorite bad error messages. Ezzell was the sole judge.

Of course, there are degrees of rottenness. "Some bad error messages," Ezzell says, "are just placeholders that slip through. We've all been there." Ezzell acknowledges he once wrote a message that addressed the user as "Dumbkopf" and was mortified when the dialog made its way into production. Thus, he sympathized with Orem, Utah-based Viewpoint DataLabs, which managed to include the following in its LiveArt install:

Setup is unable to locate a suitable version of DirectX on your machine. You will need to install DirectX before you can use LiveArt98, dumbass!

Sympathy notwithstanding, Ezzell awarded the entry third prize. Red-faced developers at Viewpoint noted that the message had simply slipped through the quality-assurance cracks and that they'd fixed the problem "about 4 seconds after we realized it was still there."

Ezzell hastens to point out that he isn't a Microsoft hater; some of his favorite error messages are from Unix, including this succinct goody:

Printer on fire.

Contest entries

The procedure failed with the following error: The command completed successfully.

Not enough memory to display this dialog.

Error: Keyboard not found. Press F1 to continue.

And its cousin:

Your mouse is not working, please click here to acknowledge.

Cannot delete tmp150_3.tmp: There is not enough free disk space. Delete one or more files to free disk space, and then try again.

Unexpected error, quitting.

What makes this entry, found in Internet Explorer 4.0, is the attached comment:

An Internet error occurred.

Submitter Jeffrey Schmitz writes: "Yeah, right, Bill, the Internet is broken and Internet Explorer is working perfectly."

Windows has found an unknown device and is installing a driver for it.

When using Windows 95 with a Compaq Computer Corp. Presario:

Your system shell has changed. The Compaq software will work with your new shell, but the new shell will not work with your Compaq software. Do you wish to keep your Compaq software working? Click yes if you are unsure.

Error 0000: No errors found, restarting computer.

And finally, the grand-prize winner:

You need to supply a fax number in order for your request not to receive fax notifications to be processed.